Differences
by Fire-Pawz
Summary: When James indulged in his weekly ritual of asking Lily Evans on a date, he never expected to find out more about himself then he ever wanted to know. He knew he had to grow up one day...just not like this.


Differences

It had been a good day for the resident Gryffindor Quidditch Captain, Marauder, and Hogwarts most well-known student of 1976. James Potter had managed to get an Outstanding in his latest Transfiguration essay which earned him a rare smile from the usually stern Professor McGonagall. Despite the fact that James had done the essay the night before it was due even though he had a whole week to complete it in.

James and his fellow Marauder, Sirius Black, had successfully managed to prank their school nemesis, Severus Snape, without getting caught. A young Hufflepuff came across the dour sixth year Slytherin stuck to the door of the Owlery with a red and gold striped Mohawk and an overly large yellow robe with the words; "Need Grease" printed on it in large sparkling letters. The Slytherin head of house was still trying to find the culprits as James and Sirius had made sure they had an alibi, in the form of Remus Lupin.

James' mother had written to James earlier that day with news that his father had been promoted within the ranks of the Auror's Logistics Department (James' father admitted he was a bit too old to continue his old job as an Auror).

Yes, it seemed that all was going well for James Potter that day and it only seemed to get better when he found himself in the library staring at Lily Evans.

"Lily dearest!" James called.

Lily Evans raised her head and brushed a stray lock of red hair out of her face. Finding only James Potter, she groaned and tried to return to her work.

"Lil-ly!" James tried again.

Lily sighed and continued to ignore the Marauder.

"Come on Lily," James coaxed, "you know you want to talk to me."

Lily snorted. "Talk! With you! Please Potter, when have you ever done anything as civilized as talking? You seem to prefer shouting, whining and exuberant hand gestures."

"Lily! How could you accuse me of being so utterly…uncivilized?!" James gasped in mock outrage.

Lily quirked an eyebrow at the Marauder then shook her head with a look of defeat. "I don't know why I bother…" she muttered to herself before turning to address James directly. "Look Potter, I'm trying to get some work done, so whatever it is that you want, just tell me now."

"You're actually going to help me?" James asked in surprise.

"Think of it my way Potter. The sooner you get whatever it is that you want, the sooner you're out of my hair, so I can get some sort of peace."

James faked a look of hurt. "It's almost like you don't want me around!"

"What gave you that idea?"

James grinned and slipped into the chair next to Lily after shifting a pile of Potions textbooks.

"I need you're help Lily," James stated bluntly, looking completely serious.

Lily frowned at James' expression then motioned him to continue.

"You see Lils…I've realized that I'm without company the next Hogsmeade visit and seeing that you've yet to agree to go on a date with me, I was thinking-"

"-No!"

"Oh come on Lily! It'll be fun!"

"I think our ideas of fun are vastly different Potter!" Lily said coolly.

"How so?"

"You seem to think it funny to humiliate and embarrass your fellow students-"

"-Like who?" James challenged.

Lily looked at him in disbelief. "How about Severus last year? After the Defense O.W.L exam?!"

"That was last year! Please don't tell me you're still on about that!"

"Of course I am Potter! What did Severus do to deserve that treatment?!"

"He called you a …a…you-know-what; after you tried to help him! He's a sneaky git and he's a Slytherin!"

"Oh, so just because he's a Slytherin, he deserves to be treated as less than human?!" Lily screeched at him.

Madame Pince glared at them both from behind her desk. Lily threw an apologetic glance toward her which seemed to slightly mollify the irate librarian.

"Yes! No! No they didn't! They just can't be trusted…none of them can be. They're all pretty much lining up to work for You-Know-Who!" James said with conviction.

"So because they are all supposedly Death Eaters in the making, your constant targeting of them in justified?"

James gaped at Lily wordlessly. He couldn't understand her stubborn defense of the 'dark' house.

"Why do you defend them so much after all the rude names they call you?!" James asked.

Lily glared at him. "Because I choose to Potter. I can choose whether or not I want to treat them as they seemingly treat me. I choose not to paint them all with the same brush…unlike you! Because not everyone fits into the boxes of your perfect little world!"

"Be that as it may Evans, can you name me one Slytherin who has treated you fairly? Who out of all of them, sees you as more than just a Gryffindor muggleborn?!"

"That's the thing isn't it?! Everyone is so used to these stupid stereotypes of people; it becomes the only thing they can see! No one is prepared to try and change things. You and your bunch are determined to make all the Slytherin's lives miserable, but you're not prepared to at least get to know them. You're all too happy to think of them all as mindless dark lord followers because it fits your narrow-minded view of good and evil. The world isn't so black and white Potter!" Lily sighed. "They're not helping themselves either by being so stand-offish towards others, by that's probably a result of their upbringing."

"This is interesting and all Evans…but I can to ask you for a date, not to justify myself to you. Nor to discuss the way the world works!" James diverted the topic as he was getting increasingly uncomfortable with their conversation.

Lily stared at James in horror before shaking herself out of her stupor. She pulled out her wand and with a quick flick, her belongings her packed into her bag. Another spell and all the books stacked themselves neatly on the trolley nearby of books to be shelved.

"Hey! Evans! Where're you going?!" James asked after ducking the stack of books that had came flying at his head on their way to the trolley.

"Away from you!" Lily slung her bag on one arm and strode purposely out of the library doors with James hot on her heels.

"Evans! Lily, wait up!"

Lily ignored him and continued forward.

James finally got fed up and reached out to grasp the fuming sixth year's elbow. "What is with you?"

"You really don't get it do you Potter?! You may not see it, but I do!"

"See what!?"

"This Dark Lord. He's persecuting muggles, muggleborns, and half bloods simply because he can, or for whatever messed up reason he has. I live in fear that those attacks on muggles will one day result in my family being caught in the crossfire!"

James opened his mouth to try and offer some words of comfort, but Lily plowed on.

"While you Potter, you and your friends are targeting students just because of their House! Is it an eleven year old, first year's fault that they've been sorted into Slytherin?! Do they deserve to live in fear of being pranked and humiliated by a bunch of immature, egotistical, arrogant, Gryffindor sixth years who should know better?!"

James' eyes widened at the accusation and he began to growl in anger.

"Tell me Potter, how is You-Know-Who's targeting of people like me any different from your bullying of Slytherins! How is any different?" Lily hissed at him, her eyes were sparkling with unshed tears of fury. She pulled out of his grasp and sped down the corridor leaving a distraught James Potter in her wake.

* * *

"You're kidding me! She actually said that?" James' best friend, Sirius Black exclaimed. 

James had finally returned to the Gryffindor Common room after his encounter with the fiery prefect and had immediately been accosted by his friends who, somehow, managed to drag the troubling conversation out of him. Lily Evans' comments were met with several different reactions.

Sirius Black was outraged at the comparison of the Marauders to the Dark Lord.

Peter Pettigrew was whimpering frightfully at Sirius' outburst, but he was also nodding his head emphatically in agreement with Sirius.

Remus Lupin was frowning, not in anger, but in thought, he was the most level headed of the bunch and this was reflected in the way he calmed Sirius down, and then ordered the Marauders all back to their dormitory so they wouldn't disturb the other Gryffindors.

"She may have a point you know…" Remus said after they were safely in their dorm room.

Sirius geared up to defend their actions but Remus glared at him; making Sirius back down warily.

"Look at what I am!" Remus exclaimed, making the others wince. Remus usually avoided talking about his condition unless he was really worked up. "You're all taught to fear Werewolves, but you're not judging me as a monster!"

"Remus mate, it's different with you" Sirius tried.

"Because I'm your friend?" Remus asked sardonically.

"Err…yeah?"

Remus sighed. "Lily's right. You don't even want to prove yourselves wrong by getting to know one of the Slytherins…"

"Well you're not exactly buddying up with them either!" Sirius argued.

"I never denied it Sirius." Remus agreed quietly, "I'm just as much to blame as any of us."

James and Peter sat in silence watching Remus and Sirius argue, neither of them knowing quite what to say.

"I'm going to sleep…maybe things will be clearer for you in the morning Sirius." Remus hopped onto his bed and wrenched the curtains shut without bothering to get changed.

Sirius growled angrily and followed in Remus' example, leaving James and Peter looking at each other worriedly.

"Do you think they'll be alright tomorrow?" Peter asked.

James nodded solemnly. "It'll take a while, but they'll come around by breakfast probably. G'night Pete."

"Night James."

* * *

True to form, Sirius and Remus managed to put their disagreement behind them and were on normal terms the next morning at breakfast. However, neither James nor Remus missed the scathing look Sirius threw at Lily when he spotted the red head. 

Remus seemed resigned to the fact that Sirius now had a deep disliking of Lily, while James, who would normally defend Lily at the slightest of Sirius' jabs, paid no attention, or simply chose not to interfere.

The week following the conversation was one of the most self-reflecting moments of James' life. He often found himself staring into space mulling Lily's words over in his head, and just as often, he would scoff at what she said and dismiss it as Lily trying to wind him up.

Sirius and Peter both tried to put a stop to James' conflicting thoughts by offering to play a few pranks, but for some reason, James was extremely reluctant to join in until he sorted himself out. Remus seemed pleased with James' serious reflections, and had even tried to encourage it.

"The thing is that most Wizarding families teach their kids the basics at home, or hire someone to teach their kids, while Muggleborns all go to Primary schools where a lot of what they're taught is to do with lateral thinking." Remus said as he and James were working on their Charms essay in the Common Room. Sirius and Peter had gone to the kitchens for supplies.

"Lateral thinking?" James asked in confusion.

"They learn how to look at things differently, and not just accept things at face value. Muggles are encouraged to form their own opinions and to take something someone may say, and challenge it. We don't get the opportunity here; we're given a text book and whatever is in it, is right. We accept that and we don't argue that it may be wrong."

"So Muggles are taught to be defiant?! Well that certainly explains Evans' argumentative side." James said, muttering the last part to himself.

"Not defiant you prat! Didn't you listen to what I just said?"

"Yeah…"

"Then how on Earth did you get defiant from that?!"

"Err…"

"Who's defiant?" Sirius asked from behind Remus. He and Peter were balancing several cakes and pastries, while looking triumphant.

"You are" James said dryly, not wanting to explain the conversation to Sirius, who was still obviously miffed at Lily.

"Aww thanks Potter. Nice to know I'm being thought of." Sirius exclaimed as he dropped onto the spare seat.

James glanced at Remus to signal the end of their discussion. They could talk about it another time when Sirius and Peter weren't around.

Remus nodded discretely before turning to Sirius. "Oi! Pass the éclair!"

* * *

"How do you know all that stuff about Muggle schooling?" James asked Remus the next day as they walked to the library. 

Madame Pince glared at the two Marauders in warning not to mess about in her library. They grinned nervously and quickly found a table in the corner as far away as possible from the strict librarian.

"I talked to Lily about it."

"You what?!"

"I talked to Lily about it." Remus repeated calmly.

"I heard you the first time you git. When?"

"When we're at prefect meetings. There's nothing much else to do so we just…talk." Remus finished lamely.

"What else has she said?"

"A lot."

"Stop being evasive you arse! Or I'll set Padfoot on you!"

Remus quirked an eyebrow at the bizarre threat. "Just general stuff. She talks about her family, I talk about mine. She told me how Muggle schooling is different to Magical, etcetera."

James looked hesitant before he finally asked; "has…has she ever mentioned me?"

Remus didn't look surprised in the slightest at James' question. "She has…"

"Well?"

"James, look mate. You have to understand that the only side of you that Lily's seen is the one which seems to constantly target Slytherins and other kids with pranks. She doesn't know you like Sirius, Peter and I do!"

"So you're point is that she hates me and she likes to tell you?"

"Well…yeah."

James sighed heavily.

* * *

The weeks turned into months and James was still avoiding Lily like the plague. 

It was the last day of term before school broke up for the Christmas holidays. The Marauders were all already packed after Remus nagged them until they gave in. The only things left to pack were the books and stationary the boys needed for the last day of class. They all woke early that day in anticipation of their end of term prank that they had spent the whole of the last week planning. Lily's words had been pushed aside by the Marauders, but Remus still looked a bit reluctant. It took a lot of needling and whining by the three other sixth year boys to convince Remus, and he had only agreed once he was sure that no one was going to get harmed or targeting unfairly.

They made their way into the Great Hall for breakfast earlier then usual which put a few people on alert as the Marauders weren't known as early risers. Their early appearance was obvious to some that they were planning something.

As more students slowly began to trickle in for breakfast, the noise level rose and it seemed like just a regular morning.

Sirius was recounting his near capture by Filch the previous night when he was setting up part of their prank, which was received with roaring laughter from the group.

Lily Evans sat about ten places down from the four boys. She was in deep discussion with her good friend Marlene McKinnon about Marlene's latest dating disaster. They broke off their conversation when a flood of owls came flying into the hall to drop off various letters and packages to the Hogwarts students.

"Merlin!" Remus whispered in horror as he glanced at the front page of the Daily Prophet that he had just received.

"What is it?" James asked in concern.

"There were attacks on Muggle homes. No survivors; and the Dark Mark was cast over them…"

Sirius swore furiously, Peter grimaced, while James frowned in sorrow.

"This bloody Dark Lord's a complete arsehole! Why hasn't anyone stopped him yet?!"

"It's not that simple Padfoot. Apparently You-Know-Who's gone off and used some dark rituals to strengthen his power…if the theories in the paper are right, that is. It could just be rumor, but there is no denying that He's just too powerful for the Ministry to get." Remus explained.

Sirius grumbled unappeased but let the upcoming debate go.

As Sirius and Remus were talking, James had found himself distracted by a completely unremarkable owl. For some reason, James couldn't shake the feeling that whatever post the owl bore was of great importance. To James' surprise, the owl landed in front of Lily who quickly relieved the owl of its burden.

James watched as Marlene questioned Lily of the letter's sender only to receive a confused shrug in reply. Lily opened the letter and as she read it, she began to pale. Tears began to glitter in her green eyes as she pushed away from the table to sprint out of the Great Hall. James frowned and got up to follow her.

"Hey. Where ya goin' Jamesie?" Sirius asked.

James ignored the question and ran out after Lily. He caught up with her on the stairwell heading towards the Gryffindor tower.

"Lily! Lily! Wait up! What happened?" He asked once he had reached her side. There were tears flowing freely down her face and the hand which gripped the now crumpled letter was shaking furiously.

"Lily?" James tried again in a much softer tone. "What happened?"

Lily let out a low, hollow laugh which James detected a waver of hysteria in it. He was beginning to grow extremely alarmed.

"Lily-"

"-They're dead James."

James froze and paled. "Who?" He asked, already dreading the answer.

"My parents…they murdered them… Oh God!" Lily slid onto the ground from the wall she had stopped to lean on. James crouched down next to Lily's huddled form; he had no idea what to do and just gaped in shock.

"You-Know-Who and his lot killed my parents because of me! Because I'm a Muggleborn!" Lily spat out hysterically. "They didn't even stand a chance! Oh God!" Lily broke down into body shaking sobs.

James swallowed the lump rising in his throat as he reached out to comfort Lily. She recoiled violently from his touch.

"Don't touch me!" She hissed. "You're like Him! You hate without reason! You're…you're no different." With that, Lily got up and bolted up the next staircase towards the portrait of the Fat Lady, leaving James Potter sitting alone in the corridor with the weight of his actions suffocating him.

* * *

Author's Note: Well I'm back, but not with the long-awaited chapter that people want me to be back with. Unfortunately, the next chapter of 'Rising from the Ashes of Betrayal' is proving to be a pain to sit down and write out, but rest assured, it WILL be written…just not as soon as some would like.  
This little one-shot just wouldn't stop bothering me, so I gave in and wrote it. As you can see, I've taken liberty with the death of Lily's parents and J.K.Rowling has already stated that there was nothing sinister about their deaths.  
Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing, I hope you like it.  
**Fire-Pawz**


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